2008 January | Heart of the Matter

January 31, 2008 By Marsha 13 Comments

I’ve got a newsflash for y’all. My little guys are starting to grow up! Bit by bit and before I even realized it, they went from newborn baby blobs to crawling critters, from walkers to runners to riding their bikes, reading and even making me breakfast!

Perhaps you mommy’s of teenagers would cringe a little, but this mommy of an 8yo, 6yo and 3yo is currently reveling in the delightful deliciousness of a breakfast that someone else prepared and served me! Canned biscuits with jelly and a big ole glass of milk never tasted so good! (Now if I could just trust them enough to make me a latte…)

Truth be told, I have not always been so apt at training my young’uns to be self sufficient and useful! This is especially true with my poor guinea pig of a first child. He was supremely pampered in that I did almost everything for him… be it brushing his teeth, changing his clothes, washing his hair, or buckling him into his carseat… on and on the list goes. Eventually, I turned into a little robot on automatic pilot doing things for him that, quite frankly, he could do for himself!

It took a dear friend to bring me to my senses. Since she knew I was a defensive type of person (read: stubborn and proud and difficult), she worded her thoughts in a very clever manner. She said, “Marsha, I challenge you to let him put his own pants on.”

What?! You think that little 3yo is capable of such a demanding task? (I know… I know! I laugh at my old self now… My current 3yo cleans the lint trap and takes the laundry out of the dryer all by himself just because he sees that it needs to be done!)

Anyhow, my ever so sly friend used that word challenge. Uh… that’s like saying I triple-dog-dare-you. It’s a throwdown when you use that word. Bring it, girlfriend! There was absolutely no way I was going to fail this challenge even if it killed me.

But it didn’t kill me (or my little man)!

In fact, it was SO easy. It’s amazing how a child can live up to your expectations, whether they be high ones or low ones (like mine apparently had been). Not only could that boy put on his own pants the right way (aka not backwards), but he could also put his shirt on (sometimes backwards) as well as his socks (fortunately, there is no right foot/left foot with socks– too bad there’s an upside down– drat!).

**Cue the choir** I had a thought: If he can dress himself, what else can he do???

Oh the possibilities were endless! For a brief moment, I picture myself living in the lap of luxury as he waited on me hand and foot. But then I pictured him saying You just had us kids so we could be your slave! Okay, that wasn’t going to work. The last thing I need is for my kid to be bratty like I was when I was a teenager little kid!

Fast forward five years and two additional kids later. I am still needing the occasional challenge from my friend– challenging me to allow my kids to do certain things that they are fully capable of doing, if only I would let them.

Sometimes it would be as simple as letting them fix their own drinks at lunchtime or putting their clean clothes away. Other times it would be a bit more challenging like figuring out how to play DVDs with the bzillions of surround sound speakers blaring correctly.

This should also be applied to our homeschool. While we all want our kids to be independent learners down the road, what are we doing now to reach that goal? A breakthrough moment for me was to make a simple chart with the week’s lesson plans for each child. When they actually saw what would be required of them for the week, they began to take charge of their individual lessons and forged ahead with that extra page of math or the reading assignment for the day (or even the whole week). Talk about encouraging!

Some things that should be obvious (like the whole pants thing) are not always obvious to me– I can be as dense as a leftover fruitcake in July! That is why I truly appreciate feedback from good friends (both in real life and in the blogosphere). Do any of you veteran mommies or home educators have any challenges that you’d like to issue? Have you had any simple “Aha!” revelations that you can share with your friends? I triple-dog-dare you to speak up. (Oh yes I did!) Not only might your friend benefit in some of your been-there-done-that wisdom, but you might find yourself positively challenged in return!

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January 30, 2008 By Cheryl 9 Comments

What I mean is….get connected.

I often meet new homeschool moms who have started to homeschool and have run into new obstacles and frustrations. Oh, they are many – and we have all had them from time to time. The problem comes not from the obstacles themselves, but rather from being left to our own devices to handle them.

Since we do not have a classroom of children to compare things to, how do we always know if our kids are learning enough? Since we are left more or less to our own devices to think about things like social development, learning styles and learning difficulties, how do we know if we are doing the right thing? Doubts can creep in – and they do.

In my walk with Christ, I have learned that without daily devotions and prayer I can easily become confused when the doubts creep in. I often find myself turning to the fellowship of believers for guidance or support through a challenging or confusing time. If we find this to be true in our walk with Christ, why is it we don’t think about the benefits of turning to the support of our own homeschool community? Why is it that we try so hard to do it on our own? God is constantly reminding us to depend on Him. He reminds us of our shortcomings. He comforts us and encourages us with his Spirit. It is through our own weaknesses that we see His strength.

If we’re not plugged in with our homeschool community we can often end up feeling overwhelmed and isolated. Participating in a monthly homeschool meeting can do wonders for casting out doubt. This is an opportunity to bounce things off other homeschool mothers who have been there. Not only will you feel normal once again, but you may also find yourself surprisingly encouraged. You may even leave with a new idea or two to help you overcome whatever obstacle that has thrown itself in your path. It is often easier to see things a little more clearly when we have a fresh or new perspective. I’m often amazed at just how many times I’ve caught myself saying “Oh, I never thought of it that way before”.

If you can relate to any of these things I’ve been talking about, why not check out the next homeschool meeting in your community? It may even be beneficial to try attending a meeting or two just outside your community as well. It’s also an opportunity to meet some new faces and perhaps make a friend or two. You’ll be thankful you had that friend to call the next time you have one of those days. I know I was, and for that I will always be thankful.

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January 28, 2008 By The Amies 1 Comment

For those of you who are not subscribers of The Old Schoolhouse here are some fabulous jobs that are currently being offered. Please read through them and follow their advice for applying to get the best results. We know that some of our readers would make a very valuable asset to the team over at The Old Schoolhouse!

Below is the email from The Old Schoolhouse:
publisher@thehomeschoolmagazine.com
*************************************************
We need a few good additions to our staff. Here’s something to keep in mind: while we love working with homeschool moms and dads (and we will consider inquiries from such), we *really* are looking for older folks to come on board with TOS. If you, or someone you know, are a parent or grandparent of homeschooled children who have graduated, you have the time to put in, and are skilled, YOU in particular are who we are looking for. Of course, we will also consider inquiries from anyone.

Would you like to work for Alpha Omega Publications instead? They are looking for a few good work-at-home editors. Our contact at AOP is very interested in bringing on one or more persons for a current project. Think you are up to the challenge? Alpha Omega expects high quality, just as we do here at TOS. They’ve asked us for some referrals for editors who can work from home. If you are interested, email us with these exact items:

1. Subject line must say “Alpha Omega Work At Home”.
2. In the email, provide a brief summary of who you are and please detail your qualifications (attach resume if desired).
3. Include a writing piece if you’d like (short).

If you’d like to be considered for doing some simple editing on a project basis for TOS, do the same thing, only instead of the subject line saying, “Alpha Omega Work At Home,” have it read, “TOS Editing”.

Feel free to send one of each, if you are interested in working for both of us. General Editor – This position is opening up at TOS Magazine. This is the main editor; the one responsible for keeping our themes and calendar, slating authors, issuing and collecting writer contracts (lots of filing), and doing a PRISTINE job editing our magazine.

The General Editor must be extremely friendly (not high strung), highly organized, and have a working knowledge of homeschooling in general. Will work closely with Gena Suarez and Deborah Wuehler (Senior Editor) on a daily basis. Must have a college degree or equivalent. Email us with “General Editor” in the subject line. Include a resume, other qualifications, and a detailed summary of qualifications. What can you bring TOS as its General Editor?

Interviewers/Reporters – We need more interviewers and reporters who can dig up stories about homeschooling’s growth and successes. Approved candidates will be expected to pitch (and sometimes write) stories, but also will be assigned interviews. This position pays by the piece. Put “Reporter” in the subject line and include a summary of qualifications. Feel free to attach a writing sample.

Public Relations – Can you write a good press release? Can you write ad copy that attacts attention? What about representing TOS on the radio? Attach a sample press release you’ve written, as well as fictional (phony) ad copy for TOS Magazine. Subject line should say: Public Relations.

Researcher – Must have working knowledge of Excel databases. Must be skilled at online searches and not afraid to phone organizations for information. Put “Research” in the subject line of the email. Include a summary of experience.

TOS e-Book Project Manager – We have three successfully selling ebooks. We need seven more for 2008. Candidate must be an excellent researcher and have the ability to work with others. Team player mandatory. Excellent writing and design skills. Send a sample of previously made ebook(s) and resume. Subject line: e-Book Manager.

Sales opportunities – Do you like forming new business relationships? Our top advertising sales reps make a very good income working full-time for TOS Magazine. Email us with “Sales” in the subject line, and we’ll get you set up to talk with a manager. Attach a resume if you’d like. Be prepared to put in several hours per week in order for this position to work for you. Sales is commission-based only.

Conference Booth Reps – Put this in the subject line when you email. Candidates must be very outgoing and able to commit to representing the TOS booth in their state. Only professionals please apply. Must be outgoing enough to agressively sell from the booth (drawing people in from the aisles). Strong math skills, organized, and smiley.

Renewals – Care to talk with other TOS subscribers on the phone? Our Winter issue just hit the streets, and with it came over 8,000 families we need to renew – their subscriptions just ended. This is a telemarketing position; email us with “Renewals” in the subject line if interested.

Layout and Design – Put this in the subject line when you email us about your qualifications in layout. What programs do you use/possess? We are looking for professional layout people to put our magazine together every quarter. Must have an eye for art and a professional working attitude along with an ability to follow instructions. Must work well with others and be patient with editors. Pays very well.

Marketing Helpers – Again, put this title in the subject line along with a written summary of your qualifications. How can you help grow TOS Magazine’s subscribership? Please tell us how you think you can (part-time) assist our current marketing team. Attach a resume if you’d like, but certainly include a few paragraphs on why we should consider adding you to our team. The ability to analyze information, including surveys, is an important qualification. Can you take survey results and turn them into strongly written marketing pieces? We need you.

Secretarial Services – Use this title in the subject line when you respond. Let’s face it – TOS is growing, and our managers and directors are needing office support. Borders Bookstores nationwide is putting together a new homeschool section, and TOS will be the ONLY magazine on a special shelving unit in that whole section. Not only that, we’re launching a digital magazine to go along with the print. Beyond even that, we’re hitting the road this season with TOS booths at various conventions nationwide. We need help keeping us organized (Gena especially!).

Photography – Have you noticed our covers? They’re schoolhouses! We pay for good schoolhouse shots, and we reference the photographer right in the front pages of the magazine. Put “Photography” in the subject line when you approach us about your services.

Schoolhouse Store Helper – Our store manager needs help. Take a look at the store. Can you help us organize it? Can you support our manager? Tell us what you can do to assist TOS in this very part-time role. Please put “Schoolhouse Store” in the subject line.

State Coordinator – This is the one position that does not pay – it’s voluntary. We need leaders to represent TOS at the largest homeschool website on the Internet. If you have a working knowledge about homeschooling in your state and are willing to encourage new parents considering homeschoolin
g, please contact us. Please put “State Leader” In the subject line.

All of the above positions are for independent contractors providing services from their home. If your business can help ours, get a hold of us – fast! If you are not familiar with us, you might consider subscribing to our magazine. If you are providing services within the homeschool market, you need your trade magazine – The Old Schoolhouse (and it’s a tax write off if you are purchasing it for your business reference library). Important to note before contacting us about any of the above positions! The fastest way to lose a contract position with TOS is by proving to be slow at returning emails. TOS is a fast growing company which has primarily been operated via email alone. We are not brick and mortar. We depend on our contractors to stay very visible by phone and/or email. Our current staffers are extremely fast with communications. We do not renew independent contractors who don’t respond to emails on a daily basis. Slow responders need not apply.

Perhaps you have a special skill not listed above. We want to hear it. In the subject line, put “Special Skill”. We’ll consider you. Thank you for your attention to this request for added contractors over at The Old Schoolhouse Magazine. If you know someone who should read this, by all means, forward it – especially to older skilled people (grandparents!) who have the time to devote to our magazine and to growing homeschooling worldwide. Hitting reply to this email will place your communication in the correct box. In order to be considered, just be sure to label the subject line according to the instructions above.

Thank you,
The Old SchoolhousePublishers

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January 27, 2008 By The Amies 1 Comment

The number of kisses in the jar was 139! Those who were closest without going over were:

Katey from Crazy Homeschool Mama guessed 137.
Joann from Homeschool Distractions guessed 135.
Daisy from Lesser Road Academy guessed 131.

They win the Math Mammoth Multiplication eBook! Congratulations!

We also want to recognize our favorite non-winning answer for this contest. It was:

“I say 95 and a half. because if that was me doing the filling of the jar guaranteed my kids would have tried to eat one.”

Great answer, Annette! We loved it!

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January 27, 2008 By Nikowa Lee 8 Comments

Please allow me to introduce this week’s Homeschooler of the Week: Jessica of Trivium Academy.

Hi, Jessica! Please tell us a little about yourself and your sweet little learners.
I’m 30 years old, living a life I would never have dreamed with a pastor husband and two blessings we call Camille and Danny.

Camille is 7 years old and was born with a clipboard in her hands, she loves order and structure and although she’s shy, she’ll warm anyone’s heart once they get to know her.

Danny is 3 years old and 100% healthy, active boy who loves to be the center of attention or at least demand it.

I used to be a graphic designer before Danny was born and now I take pleasure in being a mom. In this season of my life, it’s really all about the kids although I do like to read, shop and bake when I get a chance.

When and where do you blog?
Once we decided to homeschool, I scoured the internet for information and found homeschooling blogs. It was then I decided to document our life-changing journey and use a blog as a way to learn and share about homeschooling and life in general. I started blogging with Homeschoolblogger.com but moved in January 2007 to blogger. Our computer is in our learning room for easy access but I do most of my blogging after the kids are in bed. We have a new puppy so I haven’t had much time lately to blog but I do try to post at least every two days and one big post weekly about what we’ve done in our homeschooling efforts.

How long have you been homeschooling?
We’ve been homeschooling since July 2006, we took Camille out of the public school system after her kindergarten year for various reasons. It has been challenging but we’ve grown so much in the last year and a half that we don’t regret it at all.

Do you have a special “set aside” place to do your homeschooling?We live in a parsonage and I hijacked the unused formal living room to be our learning room. I’ll probably do this in every parsonage we live in, having a room just for us, away from the daily rooms has been a huge blessing.

What does your typical day look like?
We’re up around 6:30 am, we have a little puppy so my personal time has been cut dramatically since he joined our household. After getting a cup of coffee, a little puppy play and the kids’ breakfast, I hit the shower. We generally start our day around 7:30 am to 8:00 am depending on the circumstances. The kids and I sit in a circle and talk about what we have to do for the day, people we need to pray for and we take turns praying. I end circle time by praying aloud for my children which I feel is very important.

We’ve recently added exercising to our day so this is when we put on an exercise video and get moving. I do one load of laundry a day so after exercise I put it in the washer. Then Camille and I have snuggle time on the couch with our Bible lesson where we read the story and answer the questions together. I have her recite her scripture for memorization three times before we conclude Bible time with a prayer.

I firmly believe in structuring lesson time to the kids so instead of diving into a serious subject, we do our music appreciation next. This involves listening and singing along to a song from Themes to Remember, for me this includes more puppy play time on the floor.

One day a week, we’ll read the short biography in our Themes book and learn the musical terms, we listen to the same song for two weeks so that it’s a gentle process in memorizing the lyrics. We take a short snack break between music and math.

Math has been a sore spot in our studies this year until I dropped the rote memorization of math facts and switched to copywork. Math is Camille’s favorite subject, although she’ll list all we do as her favorite, math is always at the top of the list.

It’s probably about 9:30-10:00 at this time so we do a quick review of the poem she is memorizing and work on a little spelling. After that we spend 30 minutes learning french, then another hour on either history or science.

The day is finished after Camille practices the piano and does any work her piano teacher has assigned. We generally finish between noon and 1:00 pm so the kids have the rest of the day to play. This is vital to me, that the kids have unstructured time to play during the day, especially this young.

Danny is mingled within our lessons, I try to involve him in what we’re doing. He plays alongside of us when he’s not interested in participating in any way but I make sure he gets at least 30 minutes of independent play time in his room each day. He’s no longer taking naps which really threw our little schedule off until I made it a point for him to have independent play time each day. About an hour before bedtime, I read to Camille for 30 minutes and then Danny gets his own reading time. Baths, dinner, trips to the library and whatever else we need to do is done in the timeframe between 1:00 pm and 7:30 pm.

What is the hardest thing about homeschooling?
I would say being the end-all is the hardest part of homeschooling. It begins with you and ends with you. As the teacher and mom, being consistent is of utmost importance but there are days you just want to sleep in but you can’t. If I don’t prepare myself to teach the children, there’s no passion to share with them. I do a lot of “behind the scenes” work in order to teach the kids. I cannot say how many books I’ve read on how to teach, parent and be a role model for our kids. When we discovered homeschooling, it was like discovering a world where everything was possible and it is a little overwhelming when you really sit down and think about every avenue of your child’s life that is entrusted to you by God, every day. Gone are the excuses that you’re too busy or that you just don’t have the time.

What do you love most about homeschooling?
What I love most about homeschooling is that I’m able to make a productive difference in my children’s lives that I pray will impact those around them in society when they enter the world. Instead of watching othe
rs teach things to my children that I may object to, I can guide and lead them to the beauty of this world and be a witness of all their discoveries along the way, both good and bad. Homeschooling has plugged me into my children’s hearts, and I don’t think there is anything more precious than being held in high esteem by your children.

What has been your favorite read-aloud so far and why?
Camille says her favorite read-aloud is The Door in the Wall which we’re just finishing but I think that is because it is fresh in her mind. My personal favorite read-aloud has been The Complete Tales of Winnie-the-Pooh. I laughed, cried and thoroughly enjoyed sharing this book with Camille and can’t wait to read it to Danny when he’s just a tad bit older.

What is the strangest or funniest thing someone has said to you about homeschooling?
The most ridiculous thing others have said to me about homeschooling is that they couldn’t spend that much time with their own children, or that they don’t have the patience to teach their own children. I literally stand in disbelief as parent after parent says this to me. The worst is when public school teachers say this to me. I’ve also had someone close to me ask if I’m worried about raising ‘social retards’ because homeschooled children don’t conform to society like public school students do. I laughed, “Yes, I want to raise social retards by those standards.”

Where do you usually buy your curriculum and other items?
I buy the bulk of our curriculum items from Rainbow Resource and the rest from the publishers when their products aren’t available through Rainbow Resource. I also purchase from Amazon as needed and use a book-trading service to help with the cost of acquiring reading materials.

What wisdom would you like to pass along to new homeschoolers?
My advice to a new homeschooler is to get your house in order. Establish household rules with your children, cleaning schedules and even a meal schedule. It will make everything else flow easier when you operate within a structure that is dependable.

To quote the Mary Poppins movie, “A British bank is run with precision. A British home requires nothing less! Tradition, discipline and rules must be the tools! Without them: disorder… catastrophe! Anarchy! In short, you have a ghastly mess!” (George Banks) It sounds harsh but it is also what the desires of us, for us.

Thank you, Ma’am, for letting us into your lovely school and home!

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January 26, 2008 By The Amies 13 Comments

Today, our meme will be based on what your thoughts are on the following quote:

“Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire.”
- William Butler Yeats

Post your thoughts on your blog and then please come back here and link directly to your Heart of the Matter Online meme post. Failure to leave a direct link could result in the removal of your name from Mr. Linky.

Heart of the Matter Online Meme Participants

1. JavaMama
2. Wendy @ Serious Learning
3. EEEEMommy
4. Daisy @ Lesser Rd Academy
5. Stretch Mark Mama
6. Cornerstone Classical
7. lori@allyouhavetogive
8. Lesley
9. Betsy
10. Heidi @ Reviews by Heidi
11. Celly B

12. Homeschool Help Web
13. Morning Rose
14. Christy
15. Julie
16. Christina (Mustard Seeds)
17. Kysha @ Love’s School
18. somecrumbs
19. Hope
20. Karly @ Indescribable Life
21. Lisawa@ Koinonia Academy
22. Sisterlisa **I LIT the fire!**

23. Liz
24. Ten O’Clock Scholar: How does this happen?
25. NerdMom
26. Homeschool Journey
27. Yvonne
28. Terri Sue
29. Nikki
30. HSB Suzanne
31. Learning Together
32. MooBeeMa (beginning of wisdom)
33. amber

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January 24, 2008 By AmyStults 7 Comments

Literature is a major aspect of our homeschool. We easily spend 2 or more hours a day snuggled up on the couch reading. I have had a few friends inquire as to how I am able to find such wonderful literature to read with my son. So here is my advice on how to find the best literature and picture books available.

Use your local library. Most libraries have online catalogs and take book reservations. Most librarians also love homeschoolers, so make friends with your librarians.
Take advantage of the lists and suggestions on Amazon.com. Anyone can create their own list on any topic imaginable. You can simply browse the hundreds of 1000′s of children’s books by clicking on the links in the left sidebar of this link. Enter a search item into Listmania. Here is a list of one parent’s favorite classic children’s stories. You can find helpful lists of great children’s books about Africa, Science picture books, or Cooking with kids favorite characters, and much much more. Next week we will study Ancient China with The Story of the World. So I entered “Ancient China” into the search bar, clicked on If I Were a Kid in Ancient China, and it led me to a dozen other books under the section “Customers Who Bought This Item Also Bought…”

Reading Rainbow is the #1 most watched PBS program in school classrooms. It has won most than 250 awards. Request or download a Reading Rainbow catalog. With 150 TV show episodes, you are sure to find something to supplement whatever topic you are studying.
Two other catalogs that I love to peruse for great book ideas are Sonlight and Veritas Press. Both of those links will take you to the request a catalog page.
A Book in Time has lists of quality books for American and World History.
This Classical Christian website has amazing resources including a “1000 Good Books” list organized by reading level, then by subject.
The American Librarian Association (ALA) has a directory for all the outstanding children’s books that have won national awards.
Last but certainly not least is the amazing Ambleside Online, a free curriculum guide and booklist designed to follow Charlotte Mason’s method of homeschooling.

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January 23, 2008 By Sprittibee 10 Comments

If you have read my personal blog for any length of time, you will already know that I am a field trip mom. I thrive on fun field trips and love to go and see/do things with the kids. We are also a family that struggles to survive on one income and are excited to find a free or inexpensive field trip in an area that isn’t too far to drive to. Over the last six or so years that we have been homeschooling (and even before then), we have gone to many places as a family and I have tried to keep a record on my blog of most of our adventures. My series is called “Field Trip Foto Friday ©“… but for Heart of the Matter, we’re giving it a new day of the week and allowing YOU to participate!

While you might have seen some of these field trips before if you are a long-time Sprittibee reader, I’m certain that there are a great many of homeschool moms out there who haven’t. So please allow me to bring you some memorable re-runs of the amazing field trips we have taken. As a homeschooler, a camera-nut, a mother, and a Texan (we Texans aren’t afraid to travel long distances in the car truck)… I LOVE ME SOME FIELD TRIP.

I hope you will share some great links to the field trips that have enriched your homeschooling journey in the Mr. Linky below. I’m always looking for another great educational quest to set out on!

* * * * * * *
The Houston Zoo
By Sprittibee ~ Jan 20, 2006

I’m checking through some of the field trips we took the first year of homeschooling to see if I still have pictures from them on my computer. I haven’t gotten the photo CDs down yet, so there may be more there as well. This is the first ‘Field Trip Foto Friday’ in the series, so please, come back next week for another peek at what us homeschoolers do for fun. Field-tripping is our favorite way to learn, even though we usually limit our outings to once a week or once every two weeks except on rare occasions when there is too much to do in a week to pass up multiple day trips.

The Houston Zoo is a nice place with lots of great scenery and fun animals. Those little kids in the picture are mine… and they grow up so fast, don’t they? Enjoy your field trips while you can. This is one of my favorite spots in the Houston Zoo to stop and rest. Wish I had a yard with a pond (and huge old trees) just like this!

* * * * * * *

That was my very first field trip for my series. Don’t you just want to jump into that photo and go check out the fish in that pond? Join me as we walk down memory lane and allow me to share my favorite field trip ‘fotos’ with you. Hopefully you’ll be inspired to get out and enjoy the world around you with your younguns. Be sure to share the link to your own field trip posts here at Heart of the Matter! We want to peek in on your outings.

From my Heart to Yours,

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January 21, 2008 By Suzanne 29 Comments

I don’t have a clue about what I’m doing. No, really, I don’t. I know people who have their whole homeschooling careers mapped out from before their child is born. They know the method they’ll use. They have a plan for whatever learning styles their children turn out to have. They have their curriculum ordered, their school year lesson plans written or if they’ve chosen unschooling, they are completely confident and prepared for the life of learning they’ll unravel. Me? I have no idea.

A year and a half into this thing I don’t know what I’m doing. Nope, truly. How many days a year? Nope. Start in September? Start in January? Nope. Use a full curriculum set? Unschool? Eclectic? No idea. I don’t even know if my oldest is really in kindergarten or 1st grade. I told you I didn’t know what I was doing. Before they were preschool age I thought maybe I’d homeschool. I knew I had the ability. I wasn’t worried about socializing. I knew there were lots of great curricula out there. And then my oldest made lots of friends and there was such a to-do about registering for school and I caved. Against my husband’s better judgement.

Shoulda been a sign.

And then my husband took a job in a different city 3 weeks before school was to start. And we didn’t find a place to live (leaving him commuting more than an hour each way) until 3 days before the first day of school.

Shoulda been a sign.

I was in the first trimester of my 4th pregnancy. Every morning I got 3 small children dressed and fed and drove 20 minutes (to the best school in the district – refused to put my 4 year old on a bus) and dropped my crying, hysterical child off with strangers who could care less. That’s how kindergarten goes.

“They have to grow up,” they said.
“They’ll eventually stop crying,” they said.
“He’ll love it,” they said.
“It’ll be great for your other children,” they said.
“You deserve it,” they said.
“He’ll listen better to someone other than his mother,” they said.
“You’re coddling him,” they said.
“You’ll ruin him,” they said.
“He needs to toughen up,” they said.

He cried and I cried. Then, my other 2 children stood by the door all day asking about their brother and when I picked him up from school he was hungry; and tired; and overwhelmed; and in trouble – Everyday. So, I scheduled appointments with the teacher and I was informed that she had “only a minute to talk” because her son had a football game to get to so I couldn’t glean from her if it was typical kindergarten adjustments or if it was him. Next, I signed up to volunteer and was told that I should allow the professionals to do their jobs because they’ve been trained and know best. I attended the PTA meetings and was treated like a first-timer that needed to wise up; get seasoned.

I brought my son home each afternoon with new papers declaring things like “name moved from good guys to bad guys” with no specifics of what to actually address. I went to meet him for lunch on his 5th birthday and realized they had 20 minutes to retrieve their tray, eat, and dump their trash. So, when he needed to potty, he didn’t get to finish eating. When we told him to put his chicken nuggets in his pocket so that he could eat them on the playground immediately following lunch he said, “Oh, no, I would get in a bunch of trouble for sneaking food.” He got in trouble at rest time for holding the 2 inch square of cloth that I had sprayed with my perfume to comfort him. In the mornings he begged me to not drop him off before the morning bell. They were to go out to the playground with all 6 of the other grades to play with 2 on-duty teachers. When we got home we did homework, reviewed his disciplinary action for the day, fed him, bathed him, and sent him to bed. We awoke the next morning to do it all again.

Shoulda been a sign.

At 8 weeks we finally prayed about what we were doing. And we brought him home – with no plan; no curriculum; no ammunition in our arsenal. We were armed only with our love for our son. Our feeling of what we were doing was finally right and we had the confidence that we know what’s best. I still don’t have a plan. I have hand-me-down curriculum. I have the internet. I have the Discovery Channel. I have ideas about someday ordering cool sets. I don’t know. Most days I question if I’m doing enough. Other days I question if I’m pushing too hard. I don’t know much about what I’m doing. But what I do know, we’ll go where the wind blows. I know that I love my children. I know that I don’t need a special degree to do that. I know that they’ve come so far in such a short time and I know that they astonish me constantly with what they’ve learned. I know that I love being with them. I know that they love being with each other. I don’t know how to do what I’m doing, but I know that what I’m doing is right. And I know that at the end of the day I love what I’m doing.

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January 20, 2008 By Nikowa Lee 7 Comments

This week’s Homeschooler of the Week honor goes to Carrie: the official Gremlin Wrangler!

So, Carrie, tell us a little about yourself.
I’m in my early thirties, been married for 11 years, have 4 gremlins, a dog posing as a hyena, and a cat posing as a jerk. I’m one of those creative people who can’t make up her mind what creative outlet to focus on the most, so most people think I’m really cool to have sooo much talent, but really it’s evidence of my schizophrenic mind. Currently my ADD is getting the better of me and I have so many creative tentacles out online just waiting for something to happen so I can quit my part time job and do something else for money and stay home all the time again.

I’ve been a Christian for a long time, but it didn’t really make sense to me until I was 19 and heavily involved in the occult. I went searching for God in all the wrong places, but He is faithful to seek out His own and eventually pulled me out of the pit I had fallen into. Nowadays, I’m lovin’ my thirties and have found it to be a swell time of finally being comfortable being my goofy self.

When and where do you blog? And for that matter why?
I blog at The Gremlin Wrangler, almost everyday. That’s almost. I just can’t contain the madness in my head and must get it out somewhere.

How long have you been homeschooling?
Since 2001. Roughly.

Tell us a little about those children of yours.
There are four of them all together; three boys and a girl.
Chaz is 10, and loves to debate every word that comes out of my mouth. I count that for school, since he’s following in the footsteps of Socrates. He’s also a budding filmmaker. He specializes in action figure actors.

Zoe is 8. She’s a creative genius. Complete with the mood swings that go along with being an arteest. She’s so much like me, it’s frightening.

Jack is 6 and probably the weirdest kid I’ve ever met. At any given moment you’ll find him dressed as a superhero and in the next moment hear him discussing what it would be like to pop someone’s eyeballs out.

Xavier is almost a year old and was a bit of a surprise. He’s probably the cutest baby you’ll ever meet. And maybe the happiest. God had mercy on me and finally gave me what I think might be the fabled “easy child” that every other family seems to have one of. We shall soon see.

I lovingly refer to my children as gremlins. If you’ve seen the movie, you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about. But I’ve deemed myself The Gremlin Wrangler and find it a privilege to mold their gremlinhood into fine upstanding citizens of the world. You just can’t do that in public school, right?

Where do you do most of your homeschooling?
The floor, the couch, the table, the trampoline. We have a school room, but it’s mostly for the books. Although lately we’ve started using it since certain people can’t read with any noise going on. Poor baby. Someday he’ll understand my whole life.

Tell us about your typical day.
The gremlins whine a little, then they get their work done as fast as they can, while I spin around in a blur trying to be five people at once. If there’s anything typical about our day, it’s that we always, always get done by lunch time. I keep a very flexible schedule so that I’m never pressured to overwork everyone in order to catch up. I like my afternoons free and I feel the gremlins need that time to let some of that gremlin juice seep out for awhile without me judging them.

What is the hardest thing about homeschooling?
Dealing with bad attitudes. My gremlins have never particularly claimed to enjoy school, and before you start questioning my methods, you should know I’ve tried just about everything short of feeding them grapes and fanning them like royalty. They are all very strong willed, but I’ve found it’s the bookwork they protest. So we keep that short and then they have time for their creative pursuits. Which is also school, but not in their opinion.

And, of course, conversely, what do you love most about homeschooling?
That I can see some very strong strengths in them as far as future opportunities that I’m sure they wouldn’t be able to pursue properly in a different school setting. And I love seeing their gremliny faces everyday.

What is the strangest or funniest thing someone has said to you about homeschooling?
“You mean your kids are with you all day long? How can you stand it?”

Where do you usually buy your curriculum and other items?
I beg, borrow and steal. Just kidding. If I can find used items on Amazon, I’ll do that. Lately I’ve been frequenting Blue Thistle Books. They have a lot of really swell “living books.” We are a low income family, so there’s only one time a year (tax return time) that I can afford my books. Otherwise I use library materials and free resources from the internet.

And, ma’am, can you leave us with a little advice for new homeschoolers?
Don’t give up . By all outward accounts, well meaning people have thought it best that I get a break and put my gremlins into public school. But I have great faith, that my efforts will be worth it. I get very discouraged by the attitude issues, but every once in awhile I see a glimpse of greatness. And don’t compare your gremlins with other homeschooling gremlins! Simple learning is the best kind of learning and if you only get the basics done don’t beat yourself up!

Carrie can also be found sketching some amazing portraits at her etsy shop Wandering Ink Portraits.

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