Are You Doing Enough?

Posted by Misty | 0 comments

Twice this week I’ve had the privilege of having heart-to-heart phone calls with precious homeschool moms. I call it a privilege, of course, because phone calls are not something I get to enjoy very often, in my usually noisy house! In both cases, these moms expressed a secret fear … that somehow, they just weren’t doing “enough.” Both had fairly young children. Neither was being chased down by the authorities for missing paperwork or failing grades. Their husbands weren’t complaining that the kids weren’t learning enough. Still, the fear was there.

Why were they afraid? Where does that all-too-pervasive fear of “not doing enough” come from? I’d like to suggest a few things that all of us as homeschool moms need to be looking out for.

First of all, a feeling that you’re supposed to be doing school at home.

While we’ve taken our children out of the typical school system, it’s a system most of us were raised in, and because of that we feel uncomfortable in some ways because what we’re doing is so fundamentally different. If you’re feeling the necessity to order your children’s days like your own were ordered—9 am math, 10 am reading, 11 am writing, 12 pm lunch, 1 pm history, etc. – you’re probably going to have a rough time. Routines are good. Hard and fast schedules, though, can be cruel taskmasters. The really amusing thing is that especially when it comes to young children, while we’re trying to make our homes look and feel more like school, the schools are trying to make themselves look and feel more like home!

You don’t have the perfect set of manipulatives, rows of the newest computers, a huge library, or a room full of scientific equipment at your home. So what? Having your children curled up on the couch with cocoa while the neighbors slosh through snow to the school bus is a gift. Swinging in the backyard with Huckleberry Finn and an apple beats reading an excerpt from a dull literature textbook at a hard desk any day. And lining up and counting M ’n M’s at the kitchen table, dissecting crayfish in the garage with dad, even working algebra problems at a desk in their bedrooms means your family is living life *in your home.* A huge chunk of the reason we home school is so that we’re together at home, right? So let that one go.

Second, worrying that life’s circumstances are just making it too hard for you to homeschool.

A new baby, prolonged illness, a cross-country move–difficulties happen to all of us, and sometimes they happen right in the middle of the school year. What if we’re in too much pain to get out of bed—or we’re put on bedrest? What if our days are being spent tending to a grandparent on their way out of this world, or we’re packing and the boxes seem to never end, or we’re dealing with a child’s new-found learning disability?

May I suggest to you that God is in charge of it all? He knew you’d be having a baby smack in the middle of October. He knows, too, that babies take lots of attention. He knew about the move, the dying parent, the cancer … whatever is happening. And all of those things are *life*! Do your children not need to learn about how to tend to an infant’s needs, or how to walk through illness with grace? Can you not teach some very important lessons in the middle of difficulties, even if it means the math lessons are a few weeks behind? I think the answer is yes. I think our society has a great propensity to act like everything is fine when it’s not—you know, pop a pill and get back to work, like you see on the commercials—and we don’t acknowledge the need to sometimes take time out from the normal routine to actually walk through our difficulties and problems in a calm, gracious way. The grammar curriculum is not your boss. You are the boss. Better yet, God is the boss, and you can ask Him exactly how to handle your difficulties while modeling that very important skill to your children.

Finally, we must remember that we have an enemy.

Our children do, too. He doesn’t like it that we keep our children home to train them, and he wants to discourage us and try to make us quit. Think about what you’re hearing in your head next time you feel down about homeschooling … “You’re not smart enough to homeschool. You’re not doing enough. You’re a failure.” Does that sound like your heavenly Father? I don’t think so! Listen to what He says …

Zeph. 3:17 “The LORD your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with his love, He will rejoice over you with singing.”

Phil. 4:19 “And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.”

If you want to be ready next time the enemy comes at you with accusations, you’ve got to spend time in God’s word in advance. As you get used to hearing what God has to say, you’ll be better prepared to rebuke the enemy’s lies, because they’ll sound so foreign to the truth you’ve hidden in your heart!

Sweet mom, listen to Jesus. Sometimes I think He must have had homeschool moms in mind when He said these words …

Matt. 11:28-29 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Misty Krasawski is the overly-blessed mom of eight children whom she homeschools in sunshine-y Florida. She has been clinging ferociously to the hand of her Lord since she was knee-high to a grasshopper, homeschooling for the past thirteen years, and has eighteen more years ahead of her with the children who are glad she will have done most of her experimenting on those who went before. Her wonderful husband Rob has much treasure laid up for him in heaven for having been called to such a daunting task. After the house goes to sleep she can sometimes be found gathering her thoughts at www.encouragingheartsathome.com.