Come as you are

February 1, 2010 by Tammy

What is your child wearing today?

There are often many articles written about the benefits of homeschooling, but how many talk about the cost saving benefit of NOT having to purchase a back-to-school wardrobe?

The main requirement in our household has been to start the day dressed. We’ve bent that rule when someone is not feeling well or during the years when mom has been up with a baby all night. Most of the time the requirement is adhered to with an occasional reminder to get out of their jammies. However, the term “get dressed” has meant a variety of things through the younger years of our children which I’m reminded of regularly with our youngest who is six years old. I never know who she’ll be when she comes to the kitchen table in the mornings although it typically involves grandma’s jewelry and dress up clothes.

Through the years there’s been pirates, ballerinas, cowboys, princesses, soldiers, pioneers, and a few Disney characters that have worked on math problems, written stories, or labeled maps at the table next to me. Their dress never caused them to skip a beat in their schooling and when the last book was closed they were free to play. If anything, it most likely increased their creativity and definitely increased my sense of humor.

Although that was a season in their younger years, as they grew older I noticed the benefits in other ways. Without the typical peer pressure of fellow classmates they were allowed to become individuals with their own likes and dislikes. They grew comfortable with who they were while developing a healthy self image. The stress of having to dress a certain way, wear their hair in a certain style, have the newest and best only touched them on the edges as they came into contact with others their age. What instead became more noticeable about my children was not the outside stuff, but the inside stuff. They developed character which was often revealed with their smiles and ease of being with others.

So what’s the key? How do you go from a sparkly princess to a confident daughter of the King or from a swarthy pirate to a mighty warrior in God’s army?

“Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.” ~ Deuteronomy 6:5-7

Keeping God’s Word ever before them in all aspects of your daily life helps your children to learn about who God is and how He worked in the lives of people. Common ordinary people filled with imperfections who were used by God for His purposes. The more they know about who God is and His principles for life, the more confident they become of His love and acceptance of who they are as individuals created by Him. They grow from being all dressed up on the outside to having a heart ready and open for Him on the inside. And really, isn’t that the Heart of the Matter?

Married in 1980 and still living in the same house in a woodsy rural setting, Tammy’s homeschooling journey began in the fall of 1987 when her oldest turned six years old. As rather new believers professing Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, homeschooling was a way to live out the principles found in Deuteronomy 6:4-9. Through all the challenges of life Tammy has stayed the course growing to a family with nine children who presently range from preschool age to college graduates married with children. Her role has transitioned from learning everything she could about homeschooling to becoming an encourager to others coming along the way. Please visit Tammy at Garden Glimpses.

Do you know?

December 25, 2009 by Tammy

The Long Season of Parenting

November 6, 2009 by Tammy

8 Comments

Late summer we were blessed to receive a gardening gift from a neighbor who has a farming business where his main home is located. He handed me a container filled with large bulbs of garlic and explained how they would need to be planted in the fall in order to produce a wonderful crop a year later. Having never planted garlic before, I was very excited! This treasure – yes, we LOVE garlic! – was placed in a cool dry place as we enjoyed an unusually warm and sunny September which extended our gardening season. Finally October arrived with snow to remind us the fall was quickly shortening, so the carrots were canned and the rest of the garden was cleaned out leaving us the perfect gardening spot for planting our garlic.

My youngest and I took our hoes and shovels out to the garden to prepare the soil as we marked out our first row about four to six inches deep for planting. Carefully I took apart several bulbs of garlic with their large cloves and showed her exactly how to place them into the dirt using her little hand to mark the distance between each clove. We covered the row halfway, tossed a little fertilizer on, covered the row the rest of the way gently patting down the soil. Around the little garlic patch went an old wire border fence that would protect this area from my husband the tiller.

When we were all done, my little girl looked up at me and asked when the garlic would be ready to eat. She had such a puzzled look on her face when I told her that we’d be pulling the garlic next fall at the end of the gardening season. Next fall? She thought they’d be ready yet this fall as the “seeds” were so big compared to those tiny seeds we planted in the spring for our vegetables. I opened up one of the unused bulbs of garlic and showed her the thick stem in the center that needed to be formed over the year to give the plant strength and allow it healthy growth. A gardening lesson in patience, perhaps.

A gardening lesson in parenting, indeed!

Parenting isn’t something that happens quickly. When God carefully plants children into our life, as parents we carefully tend them through all their growing years. We water, feed, and cloth them as we take care of their daily needs. Our prayers are for God’s hedge of protection around them as harmful things abound. Regular weeding out of questionable character traits and bad habits is a necessity. God’s “Son”shine is given in regular doses to firmly establish the foundation and center of their lives as God’s Word is not only read and talked about, but encouraged to be applied in their lives as their paths begin taking them further from our gardens. And in God’s perfect timing as they mature into young adults, they are harvested from our gardens to serve God’s purposes wherever He may take them.

Ahhhhh, I remember the early days of parenting thinking that someday all the little shoots about me would be all grown up, leave my garden in the timing God has chosen, and my job would be done. God must have chuckled at my foolishness for He knows parenting never ends. Once a parent, always a parent as adult children continue to seek encouragement, guidance, and prayer support over the years. Oh, and recipes! They are always calling home seeking mom’s recipes!

Parenting isn’t something that happens quickly, therefore to become a hearty gardener for a lifetime it is important to apply many of the same care giving basics into your own life as you have into your child’s life. Make healthy food choices, exercise regularly even if all you can squeeze in is a daily walk a few times up and down the driveway, drink adequate water to stay well hydrated, get sufficient sleep with a power nap when necessary, and above all spend time soaking in God’s Word as well as worshiping Him both as a parent and as a family, Following these essential basics will help your endurance and reduce your stress when going through the sacrificial times of parenting of which there are many. And above all, remember that the ultimate parent, your Heavenly Father, is only a whispered prayer away no matter what is happening in your garden and for me that really is the heart of the matter!

Tags: christian living, gardening tips, gardening with children, homeschool garden, Patient Parenting, planting garlic, prayer

Only One a Day

October 8, 2009 by Tammy

Buzzing through God’s Word

September 19, 2009 by Tammy

4 Comments

September is a busy month and our household tends to be as busy as the bees on my sunflowers! Just as we can hear the buzzing every time we walk into the garden, it seems like you can hear the buzzing in our household as we work toward getting back into a routine.

Our schooling is part of the routine that we work at getting back on track. No more late nights as earlier mornings are required. Days are spent going through crisp new books instead of going through crisp old leaves on trails in the woods. We add new fall activities into our fall evening routine such as youth programs, home Bible studies, and our fall soccer schedule. And with summer days gone, garden harvesting is upon us with picking, canning, freezing, and finally the garden clean up.

Tucked among all the buzzing of adjusting to a new season comes my very favorite part which is getting back around the table each morning with all my children as we start our school day with a devotional time. It is a pattern that has been established through the years and the children instinctively bring their Bibles to the table as they check to see where we left off. A devotional is read, then we open up God’s Word as I read a chapter in the Old Testament, the children take turns each day reading a chapter in the New Testament, and we close in prayer. As we begin our twenty-third year of homeschooling, I can say that because we’ve used this devotional routine for so many years our Bibles have been read cover to cover several times and each time we find something new to get our conversation buzzing.

This new school year we are beginning in the Old Testament book of Second Chronicles as we read about the rise and fall of kings which leads to interesting conversation around our kitchen table about our current government and its officials. Our New Testament reading begins in First Corinthians as Paul covers the many problems that were happening within a church body as they attempted to live godly lives in a corrupt society. Again, the buzz of conversation goes around our table about the society we live in today and how we can best live a life of integrity as believers in Jesus Christ when the world around us rejects godly principles. It’s exciting for the children to discover that wherever we read in God’s Word – which was written thousands of years ago – there is still great relevance of every word in today’s world. Our devotional time closes with prayer as we take these concerns on our heart for our world to our Heavenly Father knowing He will give us wisdom as we learn to apply His Word around us in daily life.

“All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” ~ Second Timothy 3:16-17

Can there be anything more powerful than preparing our children with God’s Word as a foundational piece of their education? There is no doubt that this foundation will make a difference in our world as these children grow into young adults and leave our homes to walk in a world that is lost having rejected God. The groundwork that was laid in their lives while at home will bring them confidence, courage, and strength to share their faith and to speak the Truth in love as leaders in their homes, churches, businesses, and government. And when it comes to educating our children, isn’t this really the heart of the matter?

Tags: Bible study, devotional studies, homeschooling, New Testament, Old Testament, Scripture

Real life lemonade and cookies

August 21, 2009 by Tammy

To Raise Your Hand or Not Volunteer

July 24, 2009 by Tammy

1 Comment

Volunteer…

A simple word found toward the end of a dictionary and often found at the end of a homeschool mom’s list as well. It is a word that can cause us to shudder as we ponder our already full schedules, yet volunteering can be a positive experience if approached at the right time and place in our lives. Volunteer possibilities come in all shapes and sizes which can be personal, homeschool related, church, or even community based. It may be in the form of babysitting for a friend or watering a neighbor’s plants while they are gone, writing a homeschool co-op newsletter or teaching a sewing class, assisting in the church nursery or singing on the worship team, serving at a local soup kitchen or helping in a concession stand for a basketball tournament.

Anything can be a possible volunteer opportunity to help with the needs of others and as we witness harder economic times, a new call for serving without pay in many programs may be heard throughout the land. Commitments to volunteer vary from daily, weekly, monthly, or a one time responsibility for a few hours. It may be an activity that easily flows with our life at the moment or it may require sacrifice of both time and finances on our part. A phone call recruiting for volunteers doesn’t just come for homeschool moms. Often dads and older children get contacted for opportunities to serve. Although my husband no longer says “Yes!” to piano moving – ouch! – he does enjoy driving the church bus for activities.

Older children can easily assist an adult in a wide range of activities such as raking the lawn of an elderly person, helping with VBS, or assistant coaching a baseball team. Having older children participate as volunteers helps them to grow responsibility into their lives as well as develop leadership skills.

Volunteering is an opportunity to use gifts and talents God has blessed YOU with to bless OTHERS providing a wonderful experience for all who are involved whether the giver or the receiver. The best volunteers are those who are serving with passion and not just doing it to fulfill a necessary warm body position.

Sound good? Yes! And yet, it is important to use wisdom when being contacted to serve as a volunteer. It does seem that there is a mindset that moms who are home full time are also available to others full time as well. However, often families are already stretched to their limit in keeping up with their homeschooling responsibilities, not to mention their regular home duties. Adding one more thing could stretch parents beyond reasonableness and take away the cheerful giver perspective. It is important to keep a healthy balance in our lives as parents weighing additional activities with our main priorities.

Cover possible volunteer opportunities with prayer in order to make the best decision for all involved. There was a season in my own life when volunteering was a disaster and I had to learn to say,” NO!” Being pregnant with a family which included toddlers and younger children, trying to home school, keeping up with our general household, and assisting our own parents as they went through cancer and doctor appointments, meant that adding anything at all would threaten our sanity which felt borderline at times for this overly tired mama. Yet we survived those early days and now that our family has grown up and grown smaller, I can stretch my wings a little more by volunteering in areas that I enjoy. My weeks include a shift at a pregnancy resource center sharing the Lord’s love with those going through a difficult time as well as sharing my love for pregnancy and babies that has been enhanced through birth doula training.

I’m also starting my second season as a soccer team coach. Since I’m already at the soccer fields with my girls and have no little ones to chase anymore, it seemed like a good way to serve and keep in shape at the same time. Although I am not overly athletic and lack grace on the field as witnessed last year when a boy said I kicked the ball like a grandma – hey, I could respond that I WAS a grandma and therefore allowed to kick like that! – my enjoyment comes primarily by encouraging each child to develop their abilities and skills on the soccer field. Willingness to serve others using your gifts and talents with a cheerful heart is a wonderful motivating factor for anyone interested in helping as a volunteer. To love others in this manner is also a way of showing our love for our Heavenly Father and isn’t that really the Heart of the Matter?

The making of a diamond

June 1, 2009 by Tammy

2 Comments

Diamonds and marriage go together. Having recently celebrated my 29th wedding anniversary, I glanced at the diamond wedding band on my hand and smiled. It is not my original wedding ring as years of wear and tear managed to damage the delicate band and diamond to a point of no return. The sturdy brilliance of my replacement ring represents our years of committed marriage with all its ups and down.

When we marry, our lives together represent a diamond in its natural form. Not always pretty, but definitely full of potential. Our marriages can be compared to the four qualities that are looked for when shopping for a diamond ring: color, clarity, carat, and cut.

Diamond color: The degree to which a diamond is colorless. The less color, the higher the rating.

How can a marriage become colorless when you combine two very colorful people? Does it mean we become plain, bland, and dull? No, not at all. In fact, I think it can mean quite the opposite. Through the years the two blend together to become a wonderful well working one. A husband and wife team that have learned the value of unity and endeavor to be their best as they balance the strengths and weaknesses of one another with God at the center of their lives. Like a prism that looks colorless, yet when God’s light shows through their relationship the multi-colors are revealed.

Diamond clarity: The presence of natural phenomena called inclusions which are the tiny feathers, crystals, or clouds only seen under high magnification. Flawless diamonds have no inclusions on the surface or internally. Many flawed diamonds still maintain their integrity with no visible inclusions.

How can a marriage become flawless when you combine two imperfect people? The reality is that none of us will become perfect, but we certainly can maintain integrity as we allow God to look at our flaws and allow Him to help us with those things that may cloud our marriage. When it comes to marriage, a good test to see how your are doing it is to read through a familiar wedding Scripture – I Corinthians 13:1-10 using your name in place of the word LOVE. It’s easy to see our shortcomings and yet as you consider the end of that passage, when God who is perfection is part of our lives the imperfections disappear as we apply grace over and over again to one another.

Diamond carat: The unit of weight of a diamond, not size. One carat can be divided into 100 points. Value rises with weight.

What adds weight to a marriage? There are many factors that can add solidity to our marriages. Making simple connections with one another in the midst of busy homeschooling lives is critical. It’s easy to put our children first, but the value of putting our spouses first is worth 100 points. Simple acts of kindness such a a little note in his lunch, making sure his favorite clothes are clean and ready, a loving voice message. Reading about our love languages and applying those gifts to each other or engaging in a study such as Love & Respect which has wonderful marriage principles to apply. Time spent one-on-one is truly priceless and builds the weight of intimacy in a marriage relationship.

Diamond cut: The angle and proportions of a cut will determine the diamond’s fire and brilliance. The shape and how well the cutting has been executed will also influence the cut.

What trials have shaped your marriage? It is well known that all marriages will have conflict in some manner. The key, however, is how we will allow these to affect our relationship with one another. Will we allow the angle of the cuts to destroy or to be a healing cut of pruning that we can grow from? Keeping God centered and relationship focused will execute healthier cuts during difficult times. Marriages will flourish and become stronger if both partners are willing to become humble and speak those difficult words of “I’m sorry” or “Forgive me” adding a dimension of brilliance to their relationship.

My husband and I have a long way to go to our Diamond Anniversary, yet we are both willing to consider the color, clarity, carat, and cut of our marriage to allow it more polishing as our Heavenly Father works in our relationship. May all of our marriage relationships continue to grow and flourish with our Heavenly Father’s love as that truly is the Heart of the Matter.

Tags: anniversary, Encouragement, love and respect, marriage, relationships, Trials

Simple Clicking

May 6, 2009 by Tammy

5 Comments

It is a wonderful time of the year for homeschoolers as conventions and curriculum fairs abound! How fun it is to go to workshops and browse around the vendor hall. Parents arrive home with their arms full of all kinds of educational products for their children.

Some things will be an instant hit with our children and will receive lots of use. Other things may be left on a shelf as they were proven not to be as interesting. As homeschooling parents our task continues as we seek out those things which will encourage our children to creatively learn.

Then after spending lots of money AND when we’re not looking, something very simple catches our children’s eye and keeps them busy for hours. A perfect example would be something that didn’t cost us a cent as it was a hand-me-down from grandma and through the years all of my children have enjoyed using it…..

An old manual typewriter.

Click click click click click click DING!

Even the littlest keeps busy writing up her “stories” as she types away on those old heavy keys . Pages and pages of her writing accumulate on the countertop and will often get put into a binder, you know, so she can “read” her “stories” later.

Although much that she’s typed won’t make sense to our grown-up reading eyes, she can easily verbally translate ALL that she has written. Trust me on this one!

Click click click click click click DING!

And it isn’t just the younger ones who enjoy typing on the old manual typewriter as the older ones seem to enjoy the uniqueness of it, also. They tend to write more serious stories complete with illustrations added later or will perhaps use the old typewriter to write a simple letter to a friend. Or sometimes the typewriter is used as an important part of their pretend business office.

So, always remember that learning can happen with the simplest objects that are as close as a grandparent’s basement or a garage sale away. Keeping things simple, economical, and even educational is truly the heart of the matter in our home.

Tags: books, Curriculum, education, homeschool, homeschool convention, typewriter, Typing

The Tale of a Son

April 2, 2009 by Tammy

16 Comments

As you begin homeschooling, there’s a host of questions that may be in the back of your mind:

Can I really do this?
Can I really teach my child what he needs to know and give him a proper education?
Can I find the balance between being a mom and a teacher?
Can I keep up with all my other responsibilities?
Can we afford the financial portion of schooling at home?
Can my child be properly socialized?
Can my child still be involved in sports?
And what if I fail?

What if I fail……

That is the BIG question, isn’t it? And it is even bigger when you do fail. Or at least think you’ve failed.

Having graduated my first two from high school with one going on to complete college and the other completing a tech school, I felt like I could breath a sigh of relief. Yes, homeschooling does work! Look at the success!

Then along came my third child. The one who had the most imaginative creative stories ever. The one who could design magnificent Lego structures, build a fort in the woods, or sketch a funny picture. The one who could recite dialogue or songs from any movie he had ever seen. The one with the wacky sense of humor who was either dressed as a pirate or a military soldier in his younger years. The one who regularly hugged his mother and was loyal to his family and friends. The one who carried around babies, entertained his younger siblings, and connected with every pet. The one who read G.A. Henty late at night. The one who loved God and had a strong love for his country. And when it came to homeschooling, the one who never quite completed his studies from year to year and should have had “Procrastination” as his middle name. For this, my dear reader, is what got him into trouble.

Each year as we finished up our schooling, he always had a bit left to do in a subject or two which we vowed to work on during the summer. And each year that commitment lasted for about a week and then we’d all forget and fully enjoy the short summers where we live and not think about book learning until the end of August.

Then he hit high school and it was a repeat of those grade school years. He’d never quite complete all of his studies leaving a course or two almost done at the end of the school year. We tried a variety of corrective measures, changed studies to accommodate his learning style, and still nothing would motivate him to finish. As he became old enough to work in my husband’s business, his summers were spent working with dad and the last two years of high school that work seemed to affect his studies in spring and fall as well. He easily became my husband’s right hand man at work as he was responsible, committed, and loved working outdoors.

And there sat some of his high school courses. Uncompleted.

And there sat his mother beating herself up over failure. Completed.

While I was busy thinking about all the things I must have done wrong with this one and how I should have done this or that or the other thing, he was busy doing other things. Things like taking on more responsibility in my husband’s business, getting involved in the youth program at church by working with a group of junior high boys who enjoyed his teaching, and discipling a handful of high school boys he met with weekly. Now living in a house at the other end of town with a friend he’d know since babyhood, each day he’d stop in the house before or after work to give his mom a hug, grab something to eat out of MY frig, and lovingly tease his siblings a bit.

For awhile I’d remind him to work on finishing up his high school course work during the winter months when work was slow, but it never happened. I then went to the second verse of this tune and suggested that he should consider getting his GED and be done with the schooling chapter of life, and again it didn’t happen.

Then one day I heard the Lord whisper in my ear, “Let go and LOOK.” After wrestling with the Lord using every “but, Lord” excuse I could find, I did what He was asking me. I let go. I looked. And the Lord reminded me of the vision that began our homeschooling years. The vision was not to raise educational geniuses, but to raise children who would grow to love and serve the Lord giving them a solid education in the process. And it was then that I realized that essentially my vision had been accomplished as I witnessed the young man of integrity standing before me. He did love and serve the Lord wholeheartedly, had received a solid education, and thoroughly immersed himself into the things he loved doing. Not only did I let go, I relaxed.

Isn’t it amazing how when we let go of things and give them to the Lord He can then begin working? For it wasn’t long after that when a series of events led my son in a direction that had been placed in his heart a long time ago. He was immediately prompted to go through the GED process which had the requirement of prep courses and then taking the actual test. He breezed through it. Then there were a series of other steps and tests that were necessary for him to accomplish the goal God had instilled in his heart and he did well with each one. All the ‘i’s were dotted, the ‘t’s crossed, and his name was signed on the dotted line. And a week ago I kissed and hugged this son good-bye as he entered the U.S. Army.

Homeschooling failure? Perhaps the world would say so as the required courses at home weren’t all completed. My heart says the opposite. I’m proud of who this son has grown to be and know that in the days ahead he will continue to be filled with integrity and loyalty as a man who loves his family, loves his country, and loves his Lord. And really, isn’t that the heart of the matter?

Tags: beginning homeschooling, Encouragement, homeschooling, homeschooling high schoolers, homeschooling through high school, overwhelmed by courses, raising Godly children, what if i fail?