Dealing with Disappointment

Posted by LisaV | 0 comments

Growing up, I don’t remember ever feeling disappointed, at least not in a big way where it impacts my whole life. In a job interview I was asked about a time I faced disappointment, and nothing immediately came to mind. I didn’t play varsity tennis, but was content to be on the JV team. It wasn’t that important to me, as I focused on my studies.

Having children now, it brings dealing with disappointment to a whole new level. There are certainly times when the kids disappoint your expectations, perhaps acting in ways that seem embarrassing to you. However, we recently experienced a disappointment in our family that was not caused by unmet expectations, but rather a lack of readiness on our son’s part.

We signed our 11-year-old (now 12) up for Little League this spring, as he seemed to have outgrown the Park and Recreation baseball program. Our son saw his friends play Little League last year and wanted to join in. He started the season a newbie, not swinging at the ball and later getting a 3-foot hit. Each successive hit seemed to get longer—10 feet, then past the infield. In a recent game, he hit one for the fences that ended as his first triple. Things were going well, he was improving, and also had several opportunities to pitch. I thought he’d be a shoo-in for the tournament team.

Well, I was wrong. What does the Bible say about pride going before a fall?

The tournament tryouts showed his strengths in running and pitching, but also his weak areas in fielding and in the batting cage. When he found out he didn’t make the team, he seemed down, so I sent him outside to mow the lawn. What surprised me were my own emotions at this disappointment, having not experienced it in my own youth.

My husband talked with our son about this situation, making sure he was okay and understood that we were not disappointed in him. This could be a turning point for him to choose to improve, rather than give up. Even Michael Jordan didn’t make the JV basketball team, but that caused him to work harder to excel.

Disappointments can be opportunities to grow emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. It’s humbling to see our boys maturing and developing into young men. Our 12-year-old will soon pass me up in height and already has feet bigger than all those in our immediate family. Learning about honor, developing confidence, and displaying a good attitude are all we can ask of our offspring, and we have not been disappointed.

Lisa (aka Morning Rose) has been teaching her two elementary-aged sons for four years and incorporating study, work, service, and play into their homeschooling days. She enjoys reading, writing, and photography and blogs publicly at Pockets of Time and privately at Scooter and B.