Yesterday, my daughter surprised me with her imagination and creativity. She rearranged her bedroom all by herself. She didn’t even ask for help to move the bed or dresser. Not only did she rearrange, she also (much to my relief) sorted through things she will no longer use or want and stacked them for me to sort and deliver to charities or others who may be interested in them.

Her decorating freedom has its limits. We do not allow stickers to be placed directly on the walls. No painting allowed on the walls ( I want the condition of the wood paneling to be preserved.) No big nails allowed. No indecent drawings, photos, etc. You get the idea. However, it is extremely important to allow children to declare their own personalities and tastes in their own spaces.

A child must feel welcome in the home, not like an outsider who only inhabits the space temporarily. Parents tend to dominate the rest of the home, but a child needs to feel like some part of it is his or hers. The bedroom is a perfect place for that child to experiment with their own imagination. It encourages creativity, decision-making, organizational skills, maintenance skills, planning, perspective, artistic talents, use of color and shapes, and even shopping lessons if new supplies are needed for the changes.

Allowing your child to decorate the bedroom can give you a glimpse into that child’s “world.” It can help you relate to your child better. It can open the door to communication and conversation.

My daughter has a wonderful idea to cover one wall with white poster paper. This paper will be used to express her connection with her friends and their talents. She will invite friends to visit and draw on the paper, sign their names, and color/paint as needed. This helps her surround herself with another piece of her security blanket. Her friends are a part of that blanket. To involve her friends in the decorating process of her room also helps them feel more welcome there.

I have found that parents who homeschool are great at turning seemingly everyday experiences into lessons that encourage thinking skills in their students. Decorating a bedroom may seem like something simple and irrelevant, but it also has psychological benefits for the parent. For a parent to involve the child in the decorating process also states, “I am open to your ideas and opinions and appreciate your involvement.” Remember, some control must be shared in order for your child to participate. If you disagree with the choices that child makes, at least find a way to compromise rather than totally disregard. Remember that the goal is to open doors to your child’s inner self and to teach hidden skills, not to dominate their styles with your own and shoot down their rights to express themselves and assert your own.

Happy discovering!

Shawnee Bowlin is a homeschool mom of a 10th grade daughter, also an aspiring writer and artist. She works as a veterinary technician and has been writing for the public since 2006. She lives in Northeast Texas and enjoys animals, nature, reading, writing, and riding motorcycles. You can visit her blog at Shawnee Paints