Gender Non-Specific

Posted by Debra | 1 comment

I love that my kids are growing up in a world that leaves room for possibility. There are fewer hard-and-fast rules about who should grow up to do what and this leaves room for my boys to explore things that may not be viewed as masculine.

Case #1 My middle son loves to cook with me. If I’m in the kitchen he wants to know if he can help cut, stir, flip, taste or mash. I love that he’s comfortable in this part of life.

Case #2 Both of my older boys enjoy hand-stitching. In fact, my oldest, who can be highly frustratable and explosive, just sat down for a quiet hour and stitched a Christmas gift. He’s discovered how soothing sewing can be and how gratifying it is to make something with his hands. I couldn’t be more pleased.

Case #3 My kids see my husband model equality around the home. My husband chips in with the dishes, the de-cluttering, the laundry… you name it. My boys don’t have any sisters to shove this “women’s work” off onto so I am very grateful that their dad models a loving, servant’s heart for them. I can only see it working for good in their future families as it does in mine.

Since they are home educated I don’t have to worry about them gleaning unhelpful information about gender roles from mis-informed peers. So, when it comes to their academics, I try to infuse their learning with possibility. Here are a few ways I work to diffuse gender stereotypes in our learning:

• History: If we study famous men of Colorado we’ll also study famous women and go on a field trip to the home of the first woman doctor in our state.

• Reading: As we complete read-alouds I switch between works with male and female protagonists so they can learn to relate to both.

• Biographies: When we look at accomplished individuals we not only consider Bill Gates and Albert Einstein, but Anne Sullivan and Queen Elizabeth.

• Science: I teach them that all of nature is interdependent. Nothing is above anything else in importance. Even the smallest creatures have very big purposes.

My three boys love football, martial arts, Legos, wrestling, fireworks, skateparks and all things loud and boisterous so I have no fear that I’m “sissifying” them. But I am glad that because they are schooled at home I have first crack at instilling this vision of possibility in their lives. Not only does it give me a point of personal connection with them, but it allows them to see the world through the eyes of God, as a whole creation that is worth redeeming.

Debra Anderson has been married to her true companion for 15 years and has three sons under age 10. Debra’s passions are education, art, her husband, church ministry and missional living — not in that order. She has served as her co-op’s coordinator in Portland, Oregon and is a new resident of the Denver metro area. Debra has her seminary Masters degree in Christian Education and has always home educated their boys — even on the hard days. She maintains a blog at Emergent Homeschool.