My mother is 90% deaf in one ear and about 75% in the other ear. She had a bout with scarlet fever when she was a little girl and it pretty much ruined her hearing. She has learned how to read lips pretty well but must concentrate to understand people. Her favorite saying when she hasn’t quite grasped what someone has said is “Do what, hon?!” It’s a phrase I have never heard anyone else say and one that I swore I would never repeat but I catch myself saying it lately. A LOT. It pops out especially when I get frustrated over the stereotypes that other people associate with homeschool families.
For instance, the other day I was sitting with a group of moms and they were talking about teenage hormones and the cat fights certain young men and women were having because of them. I said I could relate and they laughed me off. “Your kids are homeschooled. You don’t have that problem,” they said.“Do what, Hon?!” was the phrase that went through my mind.
Oh, right, I forgot. We’ve got the perfect families. I think that is what they must be thinking. But they are so very wrong.
I remember a few weeks ago, too, when prayer requests were being taken in one of my groups for the families as kids were getting ready to go back to school. I asked for prayer, too, as I organize our books, write lesson plans, and buy our supplies and curriculum. I had many bewildered looks and someone even said “But you’ve got it so easy. You can sleep late and do whatever you want.”
Guess what phrase went through my mind again? That’s right! “Do what, Hon?!”
I find that I don’t get angry at all with people who hold to these negative stereotypes of homeschooling but rather I feel sad that they have such a lack of understanding. I take it as my calling to gently explain to them why the view they hold isn’t accurate. I have been the recipient of the sharp end of a tongue (and sadly the giver of that sharpness as well) in the past and understand how hurtful it can be. I have learned as it says in Proverbs that a soft answer turns away wrath.
Romans 15:1-3 tells us that the stronger should bear with the failings of the weaker. Whether you believe those who homeschool are stronger in faith or not doesn’t really matter when you look at this scripture. I know plenty of Christians who are much stronger in their faith than I am and they don’t homeschool. However, homeschoolers who have a strong faith in their reasons for homeschooling ARE stronger in their beliefs than folks who have grasped hold of the negative stereotypes of homeschooling without determining in their own minds what is true and accurate. Bearing with the failings of the weaker does not simply meaning putting up with or tolerating. A word study will show you that it actually means carrying and lifting them up because they aren’t able to do it on their own. Jesus Christ never merely tolerated or bore with us. He lifted us up quite often, and still does!
Angry rebuttals will never do anything to change a persons mind when they have already given themselves over to a negative thought. Only gentleness and patience will make a difference. Especially if you are a Christian who homeschools your child, you have a duty to bear gently with others who hold to these negative viewpoints. Here are a few scriptures that will help you to remember that when you are greeted with negative stereotypes as well.
22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, 23Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23, King James Version)
2With all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love; 3Endeavouring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. (Ephesians 4:2-3, King James Version)
13Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him shew out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom. (James 3:13, King James Version)
2To speak evil of no man, to be no brawlers, but gentle, shewing all meekness unto all men. (Titus 3:2, King James Version)
Have you faced negative stereotypes about homeschooling before? What are some Christ-like answers you have given in response to them? Please share in the comments…
Sallie is an off-again, on-again homeschooling mom to her 4 children, ranging from elementary to high school. In her writings, she discusses the challenges of homeschooling a child with disabilities and offers insight to those who sometimes feel all alone in a round hole world. Please visit her at Seaside Tales
How to respond to the negative stereotypes of homeschooling
Posted by Sallie | 0 comments
My mother is 90% deaf in one ear and about 75% in the other ear. She had a bout with scarlet fever when she was a little girl and it pretty much ruined her hearing. She has learned how to read lips pretty well but must concentrate to understand people. Her favorite saying when she hasn’t quite grasped what someone has said is “Do what, hon?!” It’s a phrase I have never heard anyone else say and one that I swore I would never repeat but I catch myself saying it lately. A LOT. It pops out especially when I get frustrated over the stereotypes that other people associate with homeschool families.
For instance, the other day I was sitting with a group of moms and they were talking about teenage hormones and the cat fights certain young men and women were having because of them. I said I could relate and they laughed me off. “Your kids are homeschooled. You don’t have that problem,” they said. “Do what, Hon?!” was the phrase that went through my mind.
Oh, right, I forgot. We’ve got the perfect families. I think that is what they must be thinking. But they are so very wrong.
I remember a few weeks ago, too, when prayer requests were being taken in one of my groups for the families as kids were getting ready to go back to school. I asked for prayer, too, as I organize our books, write lesson plans, and buy our supplies and curriculum. I had many bewildered looks and someone even said “But you’ve got it so easy. You can sleep late and do whatever you want.”
Guess what phrase went through my mind again? That’s right! “Do what, Hon?!”
I find that I don’t get angry at all with people who hold to these negative stereotypes of homeschooling but rather I feel sad that they have such a lack of understanding. I take it as my calling to gently explain to them why the view they hold isn’t accurate. I have been the recipient of the sharp end of a tongue (and sadly the giver of that sharpness as well) in the past and understand how hurtful it can be. I have learned as it says in Proverbs that a soft answer turns away wrath.
Romans 15:1-3 tells us that the stronger should bear with the failings of the weaker. Whether you believe those who homeschool are stronger in faith or not doesn’t really matter when you look at this scripture. I know plenty of Christians who are much stronger in their faith than I am and they don’t homeschool. However, homeschoolers who have a strong faith in their reasons for homeschooling ARE stronger in their beliefs than folks who have grasped hold of the negative stereotypes of homeschooling without determining in their own minds what is true and accurate. Bearing with the failings of the weaker does not simply meaning putting up with or tolerating. A word study will show you that it actually means carrying and lifting them up because they aren’t able to do it on their own. Jesus Christ never merely tolerated or bore with us. He lifted us up quite often, and still does!
Angry rebuttals will never do anything to change a persons mind when they have already given themselves over to a negative thought. Only gentleness and patience will make a difference. Especially if you are a Christian who homeschools your child, you have a duty to bear gently with others who hold to these negative viewpoints. Here are a few scriptures that will help you to remember that when you are greeted with negative stereotypes as well.
Have you faced negative stereotypes about homeschooling before? What are some Christ-like answers you have given in response to them? Please share in the comments…