In Search of Home

Posted by Dana | 0 comments

I finally get a chance to sit down and write this at midnight the day after it is due. A baby who fell asleep in the car in the late afternoon is standing at my knee, singing and far from sleep. I hear restless tossing downstairs, a fuss and the familiar cry of my three year old. Then my son walks into the restroom and throws up on the floor. With a sigh, I give up on my plans at getting this finished and attend to my children.

Life, I’ve been told, comes in seasons and motherhood is the season for interruptions. Perhaps it comes with moving, but this year seems to have had more than its fair share of interruptions. From the heat pump going out to the side of the barn being blown off, from car breaking down to the loss of a camera, it seems that every time we make a few strides forward, we are immediately set back.

And then I find out I am pregnant. A joyous interruption, to be sure, but one that necessitates a change in plans nonetheless. I am reminded of one of my favorite books as a child, one I read over and over until the pages fell out and I had to fill in the missing parts from memory: Professor Wormbog in Search for the Zipperump-a-zoo.

He begins his quest with such promise and determination.

Professor Wormbog collected beasties. He had every beast from A to Y, but his collection was incomplete. There was no zipperump-a-zoo in the place marked “Z,” for the zipperump-a-zoo had never been caught.

Unfortunately, very little is known about this beastie and he doesn’t even know where to begin looking. So he searches far and wide, high and low, running into one dangerous beast after another.

And I wonder. How many things are we searching for in this life without knowing where to look? I am certainly searching and even yearning. It is why we moved out here. I’m searching for the realization of a shared vision for our family, for years of dreaming and planning beginning to break ground. We’re close. All around us, I see our labors bearing fruit and my excitement grows with each project we undertake.

But then comes the unexpected. The “beasties” jumping out where we were hoping to find “the next step.” The roadblocks, the detours and all the bumps in the road. And I find myself becoming just a little bit anxious, a little bit harried by all that stands in the way.

At the end of his journey, Professor Wormbog walks in the door. Frustration and disappointment are written on his face as he walks in the door after failing in his one great quest.

But he’s home. After a hot bath and armed with some cookies and milk, he curls up next to the fire and falls asleep with his favorite book. Out from behind the clock peers a zipperump-a-zoo and you know that what he’s been searching for in vain has been right there under his nose.

I think back to the many interruptions to my days, the messes, the sick children, the late night calls for mom. But isn’t this exactly what I want? To be there when my children need me? For them to know that they have a family they can depend on when they are sick or hurt or even when they are misbehaving? That no matter the time and no matter the plans, mom will be there for them?

All of our plans, from the grand to the mundane, are part of our vision of home. No matter how many times that vision is interrupted, disturbed or shaken, it cannot break the foundation of our home when it is built on love. Sometimes I just have to remind myself of that, for I am prone to distraction.

Be still, and know that I am God.
Psalm 46:10

Dana Hanley is homeschooling her five children while moving to the country. You can follow her plans and adventures while seeking to live life more abundantly at Roscommon Acres.