Lettin’ ‘Em Be

Even though I have no specific lesson plans or set of curriculum that I live by, I did, at one time have at least an idea of what school time would look like in our house. I love a list. I love a plan. I love being prepared. If the truth be told, I love things my way. And that’s just how I thought raising kids and homeschooling would and definitely should be. And, by all means, shame on you, if your children dictate your lifestyle or your teaching plan.

And try as I might to make it work just the way I had pictured in my head it kept blowin’ up in my face. When I planned my school day to the tiniest detail and had all of my lessons laid out in advance, lo and behold there were one too many fits to stick to the list. They would ask too many questions during our read-aloud time to keep to my time schedule. They hate coloring, is that even possible? They detest worksheets and “class time.” They like looking inside of a turkey and watching a pumpkin rot.

This is all okay as long as you believe up front in delight-driven learning. But I didn’t. I believed in them obeying. “You know the letter sounds, just put them together.” “You will write this memory verse.” “You will go through this reading program if it kills us both.” I got angry. And more determined. One night, after I recounted another horrific school day with a “how dare he?” tone to my voice, I remember my husband gently asking, “Do you think he can do the work or do you really think he’s being that stubborn?” “Well, of course, he can do it,” I quipped, “I’ve seen him do it before.” But it stung a little bit. And it stayed with me. This was just one sign in a long list that I chose to ignore.

Slowly, it began to dawn on me that maybe there was a better way to teach my child. Maybe I could see what he likes and go with it. Maybe I could quit forcing handwriting and accept that it will come in time. In his time. Maybe I could stop the obsession with the reading chart and just let him be. Maybe I could stop every.single.time they have a question during our read-aloud and see where it takes us. Maybe I could accept that this child is not created just like me. Maybe I could let go of my own stubbornness long enough to evaluate just why it is that I’m homeschooling. Maybe the key word was acceptance.

Isn’t that what I ultimately want? Acceptance? From my Creator? From my friends? From my own parents? Isn’t that what I’ve always longed for? To just be loved and accepted for the quirky stubborn person that I am? Isn’t that what intrigued me about and ultimately drew me to Jesus? Is there a chance that He wants me to learn this lesson? Maybe it’s my turn to draw my child to me and just love him. For who he is. For exactly how God made him.

Maybe it’s time to let go of all my well-laid plans. Maybe it’s time to not be the hard-nosed teacher. Maybe it’s time to be the encourager, the cheerleader, the mama.

Maybe it’s time to become the student. To learn from the Teacher. To love. And accept.

What about you? Tell me about a time your children taught YOU a lesson…

Tags: Day in the Life, Encouragement, homeschool life, Life Experiences, unschooling

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