A Simple Walk
March 12, 2010 by Dana
The sky begins to lighten, though the sun has not yet breached the horizon. I look out the window toward the chicken coop, wonder how much they care about having their coop opened up when there’s still snow on the ground, think about sinking back into the comforter and enjoying the warmth.
Mattias is standing in his playpen, watching me. When I look at him, he smiles and begins to bounce. I pick him up and he kicks his legs in excitement.
Of course you can come, Big Guy. You like helping mommy with the chickens, don’t you?
He squeals in delight as I dress him. I could be finished with the chicken chores by the time he is ready to go out.
In comes Elianna, sleep still in her eyes as she inquires,
Mommy? I tum, too?
Of course you can come, sweetheart.
I could be finished with the chicken chores by the time she is ready to go out.
Finally, we are at the door, putting on shoes. The sky is considerably lighter as I hear Nisa shout from her bed.
Wait for me!
She calls, and we wait. She’s ready quick enough, but we can’t find her shoes. I could be finished twice more by the time we find them.
The morning air is chilly, the children silent. We make our way to the coop. Hunter trots in front, sometimes sniffing, sometimes barking. He knows where we are heading and he scouts the path, following scents along either side of the path, circling the coop twice, letting me know all is safe by sitting on the step by the coop door.
I put the baby in a toy car and hesitate for a moment. The great old tree in our field almost looks like it has been set on fire by the sunrise, and the whole property seems to glow in the morning light. The children are standing by the fence, looking at a puddle and waiting for the chickens to come out. Hunter is just waiting to see what we do next.
I go in, greeted by four chickens who think the best way to be fed is to dart under my feet while I walk. I move the concrete block guarding their door to the run. The chickens, realizing I don’t have food, walk down their ramp to enjoy the morning air.
My daughters squeal their good mornings. “Chickalee! Chickalee!” calls the two year old, excitedly. “Good morning, Dora!” shouts Nisa. The chickens run to the fence, peering at the children, wondering if maybe they brought the food. We stand, and we watch. There is a peculiar joy in caring for animals.
I wait until their interest wanes before we make it back to the house to start breakfast. Of course, we could be finished eating, if only the children hadn’t come along.
But this is what education is. A simple walk, an invitation to come along side, to join in my day. Some parts are formal, as I give assignments, correct mistakes and write new concepts on the marker board.
But the real lessons, the ones that mold who my children will one day become, those lessons occur in the simple tasks of the every day. They cannot be written into a lesson plan, nor measured with a quiz.
And ye shall teach them your children, talking of them, when thou sittest in thy house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. –Deuteronomy 11:19
It is an easy enough concept for me to remember in the morning, before we have anywhere to be or anything to do. But as the day progresses and the schedule tightens, my priorities shift. My goal becomes completion rather than education. I want the meal cooked, the lessons finished, the house cleaned. The more stressed I am, the more the children are in the way.
Because I forget that this is exactly where I put them. Not “in the way” exactly. More “along the way,” where they can watch, and learn and grow.
Dana is homeschooling her five children while moving to the country. You can follow her plans and adventures while seeking to live life more abundantly at Roscommon Acres.
Are You A “Real” Homeschool Mom?
June 9, 2009 by Amy Bayliss
Are you a “real” homeschool mom or do you always put your best foot forward when you are in the presence of moms that you think have mastered the art of homeschooling?
I have news for you. They aren’t perfect either!
I always get so amused when I hear other moms talk about how they “love” to homeschool and how everything always works out so great for them. I often wonder what it would be like to visit their home on a week day. I mean we know that mom wouldn’t screech in horror because the house isn’t clean. She definitely wouldn’t send the kids off to their rooms because they are still in their pajamas. And she absolutely wouldn’t throw the textbooks in a cabinet to give the impression that school time had been completed hours earlier because we all know she gets up at the crack of dawn every day!
No, siree, not our homeschool moms. We all have our act together!
Or do we?
I can honestly say that if anyone thinks that we (the cabinet, book hiding, wake up at 9ish, send the kids to their room to get dressed so we look like a good homeschool family people) have it all together they are truly mistaken.
Sure, I have heard the praise from many mothers who like to compliment me on how well mannered my boys are and how well they behave. What they don’t see is that I am holding their favorite toy hostage to insure their behavior so that mom and dad can have a stress free time.
OK. OK. So my boys really are well mannered and I don’t hold toys hostage for good public behavior. This is actually one of their good points but don’t dare ask me about their room! Or the fact that the “baby” is wearing his brother’s clothes because he keeps putting his clean clothes in the laundry room and I now refuse to wash them.
And please, please, please don’t ask me about the moans and groans I get when I mention it is school time, which usually starts around 12:30 (no eye-rolling!)
Now once we get started they are usually gung ho about science projects and civil war reenactments but that is only after I bribe them with M&Ms to complete their math work. I know, I know… BAD MOM!
Jeepers. I guess I shouldn’t mention that I only actually cook breakfast once a week and the rest of the time they eat cereal. I assume I should also keep it a secret that my almost 7 year old hardly ever completes anything and I don’t try to make him.
I cannot fathom that I am the only homeschooling mom out there who goes through this. Is it really all hunky dory? Should I be wearing a retro pattern and singing, “The fields are alive with the sound of music…”?
Am I the only one who has actually considered enrolling the kids in public school just long enough to get the house clean and teach them just how good they have it at home?
Don’t get me wrong. I love the idea of homeschooling but on some days it’s the act of it that brings out the worst in me and my family.
These pieces of toast are a wonderful representation of how the days of our week can go at times, from perfect and savory absorbing every flavor to absolutely no good. Yeah, we have to scrape the “yuck” off to get to a small bit of good stuff on those days.
Why? We are all human. We all make mistakes. We must all submit daily to do the right thing, the best thing for ourselves and our families.
I have discovered this principle of life—that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. I love God’s law with all my heart. But there is another power within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord. So you see how it is: In my mind I really want to obey God’s law, but because of my sinful nature I am a slave to sin.
Romans 7:21-25
I have heard the term, “Don’t speak that!”, one too many times. How can God get the glory for mending something if you never admit that it is broken in the first place?
Now I’m not saying run around speaking negatively. There is a difference between saying, “I can’t do it all” and saying “I’m no good at anything”. One is acknowledging the current status and one is self-hatred. One gives God the glory and one takes the focus off of God. You can tell the difference by discerning with your heart.
Encourage each other.
Don’t jump back and say, “Ah!” with your hand over your mouth the next time you hear a child say they had McDonald’s for lunch and they didn’t have school yesterday. Instead look him in the eye and say, “well your mommy sure does know how to let you have fun doesn’t she?” and smile real big at him and then at her. And don’t wink like you just uncovered her dirty little secret. Showing love will do more for her than telling her she needs to switch curriculum to keep the kids more interested and her more motivated.
Don’t compare yourself to other moms.
Even if her kids are always polite, are mini Picassos, only eat whole wheat and like it, and knew how to sew before they could talk (which was at least 3 months earlier than your kids), just remember that they have some issues somewhere that they are hiding. We have been taught not to express our weaknesses for fear that others will not think as highly of us but that doesn’t mean that we don’t have them.
God gave your kids you as a mom. That means that He did not deem anyone else more qualified for the position. Take confidence in that. He knows what He is doing. After all He did create the universe and everything in it in only 6 days. I know because we have covered this more than 50 times in our various school textbooks!
Give yourself permission to take a break.
When you are a homeschooling mom you are not only the teacher for every pupil and for every subject but you are the PE coach, the guidance counselor, every lady in the lunch room, the secretary, the librarian, the PTA, the fundraiser chairperson, the hall monitor, the janitor, and the assistant principal. Whew! Sign me up for a vacation just for typing all of that but it really does put it into perspective doesn’t it?
By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work.
Genesis 2:2
As long as you do what you do unto God then it will prevail.
I have told you many of my dirty little secrets here today but I saved the best for last:
My sweet, wonderful, friend (eh, um Darnelle, hmm) suggested that I give my children the CAT test to send in to the state for our yearly renewal instead of copying bulks of papers from each subject and submitting lesson plans.
Oh how I love her for the confidence she had in me but let me tell you what a silly, sometimes absent-minded little woman I am…
I give Gevan (11 year old) his test first. We actually only run into a few snags with division and punctuation. Aside from that the kid surprised me with how well he did. He was over three years behind when I pulled him out of school two years ago. Amidst all of the chaos he has actually learned and progressed more in these past two year than he had in any year prior. He still lacks in a couple of areas but he is doing well, very well. Here is his score:
Then there is the nutty but more amazing part of this CAT test story.
I decided to give Brennan (6 year old) the test next. I knew that Jacob (9 year old) would do well and blow through the test with no problem. He is just a fast learner. But, Brennan on the other hand, I knew I would have to duct tape him to the chair just so he could complete it.
Brennan does not like school. Math is stoooopid and reading is meeeeeean! He promises me every day that it is going to kill him. Yes, he actually says, “MOM, you’re just trying to kill me! I can’t do stoooopid math and reading is meeeean!”
So he has school maybe twice a week. (remember – don’t “Ah!” me!) I can’t bear to wrestle him to the table any more than that but it’s funny how he seems to recall almost every fact that we discuss and can read even the most complicated words.
In fact, his absent-minded mother accidentally gave him his brother’s 2nd grade CAT test and realized it only when she was getting Jacob ready for his test and thought it was funny that the 9-year-old was going to be tested on phonics and number recognition. Bren took Jake’s test.
Yes, I did that. I admit it.
I also admit that I wasn’t about to give Brennan another test all over again and I knew that Jacob would score high so I just let him take Brennan’s test and turned them in.
Just breathe. The shock will wear off soon. Don’t tell the state, k?
I have to say I was beyond my embarrassment when I saw his score. Not bad for a 6-year-old, eh?
So, if you get nothing else out of this article but a laugh or two at me then it was worth it. You are doing a wonderful job as a homeschooling mom and you deserve a pat on the back. You are awesome. You are wonderful. And we are going to make it through! I promise!
Married to her best friend and “main squeeze”, Amy Bayliss is a 4th year home/co-schooling mom to three boys. She enjoys writing about the eclectic teachings that bring a glimmer of curiosity to the eyes of her sons. In addition to being the co-owner of Heart of the Matter, she writes for Internet Cafe Devotions. Be sure to visit her blog, AmyBayliss.com and her family’s homeschool blog: Integrity Academy.
