One Size Fits Most.

That’s what they call it these days.

Gone are the days of t-shirts, hats or other clothing items with “One Size Fits All” written on the tag, or so it seems to me as I browse through the racks. Clothing manufacturers are finally noticing that we are not all in the middle of the bell curve when it comes to body type. Common sense, not to mention some basic people-watching, tells us that we are all unique, and even within the same size there are variances galore.

Yet I still find within myself the subconscious desire to teach all of my children in the same way. Maybe it’s the ease of teaching the way I learn. Perhaps it’s habit. Or maybe it’s even a bit of the cultural “One Size Fits All” mentality that leaves its subtle residue on our homeschool. Whatever it is, God knew how to fix it. And her name is Maddy.

In a world where a diagnosis of ADHD is so common and boys are often on the receiving end of the stigma, it’s my little girl, not any of my three boys, that has been diagnosed with the “disorder” that comes with incessant wiggles, impulsivity, and a short attention span. Along with these traits come curiosity, incredible creativity, compassion, well-developed interpersonal skills, and high self-esteem. This beautiful little whip of a girl has kept me on my toes for the past 6 years and has no intention of slowing down. So my question has become:

How best can I teach her?

Her older brother learns just like I do. We can both sit still reading for hours on end, logically reason our way out of an argument, and understand abstract concepts without much effort. Maddy learns by doing, by moving and by talking through everything under the sun. And this child can sniff out a structured lesson a mile away and subsequently will run in the other direction. So this past year I experimented with letting go of my control over her learning. Amazingly enough, I found that given space, she will choose writing work that I might have otherwise given her, read to her heart’s content anything that she’s interested in, and make math problems with her lunch.

Can it be that we can we tailor not only the curriculum to the child’s needs, but also the grander methods and philosophies? Is it possible that God’s design for each of His children is so broad that within one family we might classically school one while unschooling another? And is it further conceivable that they can grow to understand more fully their place in the world by learning completely differently side by side? Already my oldest has asked the reason why Maddy’s not doing the same math curriculum he’s doing. This was the perfect opportunity to say,

“Because God created you with differences that are to be celebrated. And homeschooling allows me to give you each what you need, when you need it. That is a gift.”

This year, Maddy’s first grade year, has started out with a few bumps in the road. We have traveled to smoother places in the last couple of weeks and are learning what kind of routine works best. For our attention-challenged spitfire, five-minute lessons are the norm. I have successfully guided her in learning to tell time, understanding fact families, memorizing poetry and completing mapwork in our study of continents, among other things, all in five-minute increments. On her own time she draws and writes books, cares for her “pet” stuffed animals, reads to her little brothers, and plunks out tunes on the piano. Often she dances. And she’s always learning, with the aid of, or in spite of, me.

This was the same child who, just a year or so ago, I was convinced I could never teach at home. I didn’t trust myself. I didn’t trust her. Quite simply, I didn’t trust God’s faith in me. In His mercy, I was proved wrong.

I have learned over these last 5 years that change and growth in me is as inevitable as in my children. I know that without a doubt, each of my children breaks the mold. Not because of any learning challenges or giftedness, labels they might attract in the “real” world, but because their Creator knew enough to grace them with individualities that it is now my and my husband’s job to cultivate. My little “attention-different” child is counting on us to never give up the vision God has placed in our hearts.

So now I see. One size doesn’t even fit most. One size fits one.

But in fact God has arranged the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. If they were all one part, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, but one body. 1 Cor. 12:18-20

Christine is a Christian, homeschooling mom to three boys and a girl, ranging in age from 9 to 2 years old. She is a musician by trade, eclectic in homeschool style, and continues to grow and learn along with her children in this journey of life and discipleship at home. Visit her blog at Fruit in Season.