What a Day, What a Day!

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People often ask me what it’s like to home school a first grader (Cameron, age 7) with two other small children (Zack, 4 and Eliana, 2) at home. After this little ditty, they might be sorry they asked. But here’s A Day In The Life Of This Home Schooling Ma And Her Troops.

Waking Up

7:18: Ma wakes up to the sound of her eldest son stomping across his room to mine, barking some kind of inane question like, “Mom! Can I get out of bed now?!”

7:19: Ma mumbles something to the effect of “Hmmmmphhh-aaaa-gooooo-giiit-sa-cereal. An-waash-tee-vee.”

7:25: Zack joins his brother to watch the tube.

7:28, 7:35, 7:42, 7:48, 7:52, 7:57: Cameron runs up the stairs, down the stairs, up the stairs, down the stairs, up the stairs, down the stairs, each time taking a second to shout “Ma! Get up!”

[I never did like mornings.]

Morning Routine

8:00: After listening to Eliana belt out “UGGHH” every 28 seconds from her crib, Ma finally pulls her sorry self out of bed. Then she fixes breakfast and smiles at the three bed heads who have So Many Loud Things To Say So Early In The Morning. The kids trash the entire kitchen with spilled milk, dropped silverware, and banana peels.

8:30: Next comes bath time, but only if there’s a high Stink Factor and/or a high Going Into Public Probability. But regardless, Zack and Ma usually have a nice conversation about wearing the Batman shirt for the eighth day in a row, Cameron gives his teeth the once-over, and Eliana toddles around misplacing the clothes that Ma has so nicely laid out for the boys.

9:00: Ma and all three troops head to the glider rocker, where we “fervently discuss” who will sit where and which Bible to read, and then we settle into a story (or six). Ma tries to work in a three-point sermon each day about Loving Each Other Despite The Fact That We’re All Miserable Sinners, Especially When Our Siblings Dare To Even Think About Touching Our Things. Good stuff like that.

[Oh! And that 9:00 thing? That's on a good day. You know, about once a week. Most of the time it's 10:00. We don't exactly ride the Speed Train 'round here.]

9:17: Prayer time. Eliana claps her hands together and says “Duh!” which I can only assume is her shortened way of saying, “Dear God, thank you for this Blessed Person You Have Given Me As My Mother.” Then Zack adds his prayer of thanks for the food, vitamins, and fire hydrants, and Cameron simply waits for the “Amen” so he can be the first to say, “Canwehaveasnacknow?”

9:31: After that deeply spiritual experience, Ma gets the youngsters settled with snacks on the couch, giving them strict instructions to Watch TV.

9:32: Eliana bounds off her seat, attempting to place herself Smack Dab In The Center Of Ma’s Attention.

Morning School

9:45: Ma and Cameron sit down to “do school.” More Bible reading, memory work, art appreciation, poetry, handwriting, workbooks, critical thinking activities…the whole nine yards.

10:00: Snack.

[And lest you think we accomplish all our learning in 15 minutes, ha ha, ha ha, ha ha ha! Morning school usually takes a good couple of hours, and that is all done around changing diapers, loading the washer, staring out the window, cleaning up messes, ignoring the phone, and breaking up fights.]

Midday Break

11:30: Prep for lunch and make a stab at the disaster that I like to call “breakfast.”

12:00: Eat lunch and converse about boogers, frog noises under the chair, and just what exactly constitutes an acceptable burp at the table.

12:30: Ma cleans up and does phone/computer work while the troops are (for once!) not asking for a snack and are occupied.

1:00: Ma reads books to the younger two while Cameron reads on his own or creates some kind of construction-set-masterpiece that Ma will likely trip over when she heads down the stairs.

1:30: Ma settles Eliana into the crib for her nap, and then spends a full sixty seconds in praise and worship over the loveliness, the holiness, the gloriousness of nap time.

1:40: Ma fixes two heaping plates of snacks for the boys and then piles them and herself on the couch.

Afternoon School

1:45: Ma reads and reads and reads out loud until she is either “a little hoarse” or falling asleep. [And I betcha didn't think you could fall asleep reading aloud, HUH!?!? Well, don't laugh.] [The kids are used to their old, tired Ma.]

2:30: Ma takes a little snooze, while the boys use this time to practice their best car zooming noises. [And I betcha didn't think you could catnap with all that noise in the background, huh?!] [Ma is used to her young, energetic boys.]

3:00: Time for Math, or Science, or whatever needs to be done.

Bewitching Hour

3:30: Eliana wakes up. Chaos reigns as Everyone Needs Ma And They All Need Her Now.

4:00: TV to the rescue as the boys watch whatever edutainment happens to be on. Ma “talks” to Eliana while busting around the house catching up. [As if I could ever catch up with all that needs doing 'round this house.]

4:30: Dinner prep. More TV for the kids if it has been one of those days or if dinner requires more effort than slopping some grub out of the crock pot.

Evening Routine

5:00: Geriatric family sits down to eat.

From there, it’s a blur until bedtime. At which point my seven-year-old asks me the same question he’s been asking every night for two years: “Mom? Whaterwedoin’ tomorrow?”

School, son. School. With a whole lotta chaos in between.

But in all the chaos are my children—three special kids who I get to know and watch grow, and that is a beautiful, blessed thing.

Check out my article on page 40 of the new flipbook edition of Heart of the Matter Magazine.

In her day job, Lisa Smith attempts to transform her three children from super-charged emotion-bombs into contributing members of society. And in her “free time,” roughly 11:00-11:30 p.m., she saves the world (i.e. “writes”) via her website, www.stretchmarkmama.com.