I usually stick to informational articles but this time I wanted to share why we decided to home school our kids. It is a clear illustration to me how God is always with us and has a clear plan for our lives.

My husband and I married relatively late in life and had the first of three boys. It wasn’t until our oldest was school age that we began to realize he wasn’t like other children. Intense meltdowns, delayed potty training, not wanting to play with other children and poor eye contact had us going to several doctors. Many evaluations later we were told he was on the autism spectrum. Autism? You mean like ‘Rainman’? No, actually more like ‘Temple Grandin’. (If you have the chance please watch the HBO movie. It will be on DVD this summer and probably on itunes as well. I cannot rave about it enough.)

I had thought about homeschooling before he was school age. The thought of putting my precious boy on a bus and being away from him all day did not sit well with me. Also my husband and I were growing deeper in our Christian faith and we wondered what path God wanted us to take. I read and researched but the local school seemed wonderful and so off to Kindergarten he went.

It was bad. It was very bad. It was too noisy, too bright. He was overwhelmed. He couldn’t keep up with his classmates and he knew it. He had horrific meltdowns. By this time I was convinced I couldn’t teach him – he needed experts, right?

Our middle son went to the local Pre K program and was soon diagnosed with autism as well. As for our youngest? I knew he was different from the minute he drew breath. He literally screamed in the car for the first six months of his life and I went places I only absolutely had to go until we could turn him around in his seat. After a long hard fight on my part it became apparent to even the ‘experts’ that he was on the spectrum also.

By the time our oldest was in third grade I was starting to realize public school was just not going to work for our children. His teachers really didn’t want to have anything to do with a kid who had meltdowns and couldn’t bear to be touched. He was also showing signs of having trouble reading, though the school insisted that it was due to his autism. I knew it wasn’t but we couldn’t afford a private evaluation at the time. Our middle son was being bullied and the school wouldn’t do anything about it and started to have meltdowns of his own.

By the end of that year I was adamant – I wanted them home.

I started researching and reading again and even bought a curriculum. But my husband asked me to try them at another school that had a year round schedule and a smaller class size. If it didn’t work then we’d bring them home. Our youngest started the Pre K program and seemed to do well.

At first it worked. My oldest son had a wonderful teacher and my middle son seemed to like the smaller classroom. Then the bullying started. Here we go again.

We spent hours at school. IEP’s (Individualized Education Plans), FBA’s (Functional Behavior Assessments), BIP’s (Behavior Intervention Plans) were all written and either poorly implemented or not at all. I literally sat with my middle child most of the school day in his class. My children were suspended, restrained, thrust into ‘time-out’ rooms and finally my oldest one was charged with assault for – as the outraged juvenile probation officer put it ‘a clear manifestation of his disability’. (The charge was dismissed – my oldest is hypo sensitive and cannot verbally relate when he is sick. He had raging case of strep when he had this meltdown) Then our middle son had his own meltdown and the school called Social Services and accused me of medical neglect due to an utterance he made. (This despite the fact that my cell phone records showed I called our therapist the minute I stepped out of the school building.) Social Services found the complaint ‘unfounded’ but I cannot begin to tell you how much it hurt to have my mothering skills called into question like that.

Logically, I know my sons have more doctors than my eighty year old grandmother and DSS concurred, but it HURT. I cried out to God and He answered me. I was looking to the wrong ‘experts’.

That was it as far as my husband was concerned. God could not have made it any clearer if He’d rented a neon sign and put it in our yard. The boys needed to be home.

And they’ve been here every since. That was three years ago and though I go through periods of panic and worry that they aren’t getting the education they need, I truly know better. My oldest son does have dyslexia and we are now beginning the remediation process late. My middle son has Central Auditory Processing Disorder and the quiet environment of our home has helped him tremendously. Our youngest – who would have gotten the ADHD label if he’d stayed in public school – now knows square roots. At age seven. It’s hard having teaching kids that are smart in areas that I struggled with in school. I’m starting to realize my own education was sorely lacking and my love of self learning has returned. I’m learning alongside my boys and I love it!

So that’s our journey to homeschooling. It was a hard road to get here but I am ever so glad that we are here. God showed me that He is the ‘expert’ when it comes to our children and He knows their every need. He makes it clear to us that He has plans for each of our boys.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

Peggy Dalley has been married to her best friend and husband for 13 years. She uses the eclectic approach to homeschool their three sons, 12, 10 and 7. Her interests include writing unit studies, Bible study, history and she is working hard to become a Proverbs 31:10 woman instead of a Proverbs 21:9 woman.